So thats why I am tired!

The results of my hormone test has come in. There seems to be nothing wrong although the test was for day 21 so I need to go in again to get the test again.

But my iron results came back and I am not surprised that I have been tired, but I am surprised I have been functioning! My iron is meant to be in between 10-30, and it was 3.2! So there you go!

Janette came up this weekend and we had a good time together. She is such a lovely person. We did some shopping, went for a walk, scrapped and watched DVDs. It was a nice relaxed weekend. I also managed to finish off a lego system that I am super proud of.

So that's what you really think!

Janette and Karen were very good friends for years. Janette even flew down from Darwin to celebrate Karen's 30th birthday which ended up being a rather non-eventful "Girls night in".

So when Janette moved from Darwin to Brisbane and needed a place to stay while she found a house Karen was more than happy to help. But two weeks turned into six weeks as they found it unusually difficult to find a house. Janette's dog Diva was fighting with Karen's dogs. So I took Diva for a month while Janette sorted their housing.

There was no blow up, but there was a negative vibe between the two of them. I don't have much to do with Janette because she lives an hour away. But occasionally she likes something on my facebook and she is a very loving person.

She has absolutely copped it these last 14 months though. She had trouble finding her house, then she found that most of her stuff she had stored in the trailer which was covered well with tarps had been wrecked by mold from the near constant rain we had. Then her eldest child dropped out of school. Her husband left her and moved to South Australia. Then her youngest child decided to move to SA to be with his Dad, which was the worst idea ever as Mark is a selfish, rough, deliberately intimidating man.

So two nights ago Janette pops up on my facebook. She has a weekend off and would like to come and visit. We talk about going to the beach, maybe catching up with Karen as she hasn't seen her since she moved out. We talk about how her oldest can play computers with Jason and my boys and everything seems great. Then she messages "had some shitty news and would just like to make some time up with u guys". I reply "Hey that sounds serious, is it your health?" and she says "yes". 

Janette is a tough girl, she has had mini strokes before, and with her taking a line like that, I am fearing for her. Obviously she wants to talk about it in person, so I am going to wait until she comes up on the weekend. 

So the next day go about setting up the coffee with Karen for Janette. It goes like this - Me: "Hey honey, how are you going? Are you free for a coffee this Saturday?". 

Karen: "Hey not bad you? Sorry heading up to meet my new niece this weekend". 

 Me: "Oh how exciting! Enjoy meeting the new little one x We will catch up soon. Jay was coming up and wanted to see you. Next time."

Karen: "have fun catching up with her".

Is it just me or does that comment sound a little bitchy? 

 Me: "She messaged me last night, shes going through a rough time. I think women need to stick together as life gets pretty rough sometimes. She wants to catch up with you but is scared you don't want to."

<no reply> Several hours later...


Karen: "I was hoping to just let this all go and we would just catch up sporadically as I don't really have the energy or inclination to explain myself. First of all I was not impressed you stepped in when it had nothing to do with you regarding Janette etc. Secondly it is up to Janette to contact me as frankly she owes me far more than an apology and I have received nothing from her. I don't particularly care if she is scared as she has to make the first move. Thirdly I don't really care that she is going through a rough time as she didn't really care when i was needing help"

"I don't expect you to understand why i feel like this and i also don't really care what your opinion of it is as this is how i feel and i am entitled to my feelings."

"As for women sticking together well you only seem to feel like this as long as it's on your terms so i really am not interested at all."

"You have asked why i don't spend a lot of time with you recently it's because you always have an opinion on my life and seem to beat me over the head with it but if i offer any advice to you well i couldn't possibly know what i am talking about..."

"I frankly don't have the energy as i have my little girl to care for and that is the most amazing thing to me so i only see people if i have the time after her needs are met and of course i have some time with rick"

"You don't need to reply to this and if we are no longer friends then that's fine too. I guess i have felt like this for a while but didn't really have the time to get it down succinctly enough without babbling or getting really angry and hurt like when i first had these feelings"

Picture me like this ????  And then I realise I am done. I can not believe she would speak like that, and I do not believe what she accused me of. It has been coming for a while I guess, and I am done. I have changed her settings on facebook so that I no longer get her notifications. I am not going to contact her, although I will respond if she contacts me. 

Even though I am done with her. I don't like to burn bridges. So I respond with this: "It sounds like I have been quite rude to you, and I am sorry as I never meant to offend you."

Karen: "Thank you so much for saying that".

"I have felt like this for a little while but i just didn't have the head space to really deal with it"

"I was just so hurt by Janette..we were friends for 10 years..."

"She does love you. I guess I laid it on too thick with the parenting advice?"

"yeah but to be fair it's not just you...Tara does too and other people. It just frustrates me because no one takes anything i say seriously as if what would i know....but i know a lot of things and i am not a moron..."

 "I think you're a fantastic mum"

"thanks :)"

Before I close this chapter I would like to add that newborns take up a lot more of first time around mother's time than second time around mums. From my perspective, she doesn't have to work, she bottle feeds and her baby sleeps 7 hours a night. I don't see where this huge commitment of "meeting baby's needs" is coming from. Karen has not yet learned that she looks after her babies needs by having a life herself and getting out and about to safe places and taking the baby along with her. It seems quite clear that she doesn't want anybody to tell her. I wish her well, I am sure I will cross paths with her in our random future. But for the foreseeable future: I am so done.
 

Its good to have a few parties

My main objective for this year was to slow down and take care of everyone's physical and mental health. So that meant not hosting any official parties.

Well that went right out the window when I realised that Jason's birthday was about to suck!

I arranged for his friends to meet him for an hour of laser tag and arcade games. Then we went out to our favourite chinese restaurant. We ordered heaps of dishes and split the bill, including dessert it was $18 each!

Then he had a surprise net con. I made jewellery with the girls and everyone felt comfortable and stayed for the weekend. I had a really good time, and the house looks great (nothing like a good spring clean before a party).

I gained a kilo from the adventure but my house is cleaner and I am motivated to keep going.

Its a balance :)